She just wants to have sex! That is all!

So you meet a woman and she’s attractive. You’re attractive yourself and the attraction to each other is mutual and so the chase of the goose begins. This is all about mating. That’s what we do as humans we mate. And although a woman and a man mate differently in the end we all want to end up with someone right?

So I find myself puzzled at the notion of a woman being judged if all she wants to do is have sex with a guy. Call me a millennium girl but not every girl wants to marry a dude off and become wifey. We live in times where women are independent. Can hold their own and many woman can do more for themselves than most men can.

So I asked a few guys this question, what if all she wants to do is have sex and keep it moving. Do you know all of them stated that she is a “hoe” if all she wants to do is have sex. I gave all of them a side eye stare down in disapproval. How is she a hoe because she doesn’t want anything else from you but a physical interaction? It kind of sounds arrogant for any man to say; “If she doesn’t want a relationship with me than she is a hoe. She isn’t wife material.” That is a load of crap if you ask me.

As a man think about it, she may not want the commitment. She may not believe you qualify as long term potential. What men fail to realize is that us woman take each guy and evaluate the situation.

Here are the options:

Husband material

Relationship material (not quite at the “always and forever” level just yet)

Temporary distraction

Party Recruit (a good time)

Seasonal boyfriend (companion for the holiday season)

Just a f**k

Now as you can see I have listed only one option that involves having a permanent status. Why must men feel that they control the “cookie”. In all actuality woman do. We control when we want to give it up and when we want to seal it up. That doesn’t make us a hoe if all we want to do is “Jones” it up with you and send you on your merry way.

Perhaps did you think of the possibility that as a man to her you aren’t worth more than just a f**k? Hmmmm think about!

*This is all about women empowerment and the fact that we have our options. Do I speak for all woman, no. Then again its plenty more to be said! 😉

Now for your listening pleasure…listen to one of my all time jams!



  1. I used to think like this when I was in the world, now the Lord showed me that it all just leads to a very hot place and I’m not talking Bahamas! The men I kept my “cookie” wrapped for put rings on it; which is more than I can say for the ones who got a sample. Those are just my thought on the subject. Love ya girl! “keep it write”!

  2. Put the cookie on Locked Down Five years ago and have not looked back. Men will never take seriously a woman just gives into their sexual urges because it feels good at the time. Women who just give it away will be labeled, get no respect and just be known as “Easy Pickins”. There is a price to pay for uncommitted sex. There is no such thing as free love. Celibacy is the best way.

  3. Wow i find both comments extremely personally commenedable indeed . i find that type of commintment great! However i have a problem with people saying men have all the power. Now i do feel a women should go out ad screw with every man she meets, but certainly she should not be judged differently than men. women can run CEO companies, raise children on their own, they are in all aspects of life doing their thing. why should having her sexual appetite taken care of be in any one jugdement?

  4. slight typo there. i meant i feel a women should not screw every man she meets

  5. I rarely ever chime in on these sort of things but here it is…all that fucking around you did before you got married was practice for the real thing. That is the purpose of dating–to gain sexual and emotional experience so that you could figure out what you are seeking in a partner. You couldn’t know that without giving yourself to someone wholly and completely. Celibacy and abstinence are NOT the best way. It is this very mindset that leads to teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases in our communities because our mother’s teach us to save ourselves for marriage without giving us all the facts and talking to us about the changes in our body and the desires that come from it. And let’s be honest, is saving yourself for you future husband realistic? A lot of women aren’t getting married to much later in life–I’m talking late thirties early forties. I refuse to believe that a woman should deny themselves the learning experience of an almost-husband because she’s waiting on the ONE who might never come. I’m not saying to treat your womanly gifts like trash, I’m just saying that don’t believe saving yourselves for something that may not come is the answer. If you encountered numerous men who used you with no regard for your feelings or concern for a future together, you might blame it on your “picker” and not your nature. Because let’s face it, ladies, our pickers are off. We have daddy-issues and unrealistic expectations that many men wouldn’t be able to live up to. That does not mean we can explore what it means to be a woman–a SEXUAL woman. People are sexual beings.The sooner women accept that and stop judging one another, the sooner we can move on. *end rant*

  6. What happens when feelings get involved? It may start out as just a f*ck thing but realistically, someone is going to catch feelings because sex is a mutual connection between two people. People are in it for the physical sense but it seems “animalistic” to say that no one won’t catch feelings for the other. So if the person ends up falling for the their partner, and things aren’t as serious as they would like…then what happens next? It’s almost as if you’re setting yourself up for failure. After so long….people catch feelings for one another….this is how baby mama/ baby daddy drama is created. When there’s an “accidental” pregnancy, and the father doesn’t want to have anything to do with the child, then the mother is complaining because he’s a deadbeat dad. This is an unrealistic view of what sex should be…the Maury show is proof that people need to keep their legs closed.

  7. Men are confusing. They complain about women getting too “attached” after sex and not being able to maintain a “casual” relationship but when they meet a woman who only wants sex she’s a “slut” . I’m very confused by this

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