Excerpt of Cookie Too

            I cursed under my breath as I made my way across the 7 Eleven parking lot. One thing for sure I was glad it wasn’t as cold as it was yesterday and the winter air was actually cool. I was in an ok mood anyhow since I had just had sex with Donnell. That’s what I was doing before I was succumbed to go to work to make 500 buttered biscuits. I didn’t get paid enough for this annoying shit. This was my day off.
            I inhaled deep to try to tackle my aggravation and make my way across the parking lot. It was the weekend and it looked like everyone had somewhere to go. I for one had to go into Beefy Burger to work. I sighed jumping at the sight of a roach as big as my finger crawl across my path. I dodge it and cringe.
            “Hey!” I yelled out tapping the side of a car. Now I know he see me standing here. I took my attention away from that nasty ass bug and back to what was current at hand. Some idiot in his car had done cut me off. Stuck between a rusty car and a parked car I tried to manure out of the way so that he could drive by and I could continue my walk to the bus stop.
            His dumb ass finally decided to drive off after he couldn’t find whatever he was looking for in his car. Then I felt a tug on my leg. What the…
            Looking down I tried to find what had a hook on my pants when the tugging increased. Oh shit my leg is stuck. Realizing that the rusty car had a metal stick coming out that caught hold of my pants I slam my hands on the side door of his car to alert him to stop.
            Pressing my weight on the car I hurriedly tried to pull my leg when the driver started to speed off. Falling down onto my back I yelled out, “Hold up!”
            I try to sit up in the same motion you would act out if you were doing stomach crunches and tried to reach for my pants but glancing to my left I see his back tire. My legs completely under his car now, I see the tires motion closing in toward me. I fall back to try to slide from underneath only to feel the massive weight of the car drive over my stomach.
            I scream out in agony as I clinched my abdomen so tight I forgot to breathe out. The car completely stopped as I tried to yell over his engine. My leg was finally free, but I felt that my insides were slowly dissolving into puddy as I tried to lean over to lessen the pain.
            I see a bright red light to my right, are they about to back up? The car’s reverse lights beamed into my eye sight when I saw it motioning backwards I hysterically rolled over hoping to get away but when I felt a piercing shot go through my back I knew I didn’t move fast enough.
            Suddenly my head was slammed down on the ground, my body tossing to its left side as I could hear a blast inside of my head. I squeezed my eyes closed tight and balled up my fist to take the pain, when I realized his back tire began to run directly over my head. I screamed out stop. My voice was groggy and hoarse as I felt a rush of salty liquid form around my mouth. Blood.
            I felt my back sink in as another tire attacked it and felt my bones crack. The sound of my bone breaking caused me to shiver in fear and use all of my strength to bring the only power I possessed into my voice. I heard people screaming around me, “Hey stop that car!”
            As if I peed on myself a gush of warmth passed down my leg as I felt my right leg break slicing my skin in half as the bone made its way into the surface. I felt the car drive forward again connecting its tires with my side causing my entire body to roll over on my back.
            I gave up. I could no longer fight the urge to squeeze tight so that the pain wouldn’t hurt. I allowed the tightness in my neck to subside, my hands to let loose, and body to lay limp. I had given in; I no longer could get myself free.
            I felt someone grab my hands pulling me from underneath the heavy metal asking if I could hear them. I could but I chose not to talk. It hurt too much to even think. I had given in. Maybe after all the shit I’ve done in my life this was it. Payback for doing wrong. My time had finally come and God was done giving me chances. Shit who could blame him, I ain’t did too much of anything good in my life. And now here I lay only a matter of blocks away from where I grew up, laying in my own blood. Dying.
            I always imagined that when it was my time, that I would remember everything thing I learned about in Higher Touch, that the shouting, praying, and crying would help me get to heaven. Would that work right now? Would God say Lyric James, bring yourself here child. It’s time for you to come home. I doubted it; I just knew God was going to turn me away.
            Why wouldn’t he? If Mama was here she would say, “Lyric gets your life together. No weapon formed against you shall prosper. You hear me?” But she wasn’t here saying that. Instead I was dying in my own blood on this cold cement.
            If I would have had it my way, I would have said that I went to college, got married, had kids, and was a church going woman who did no wrong. Instead I lived the life of a hustler, chasing fast money, sex, drugs, and alienating everyone around me who ever loved me. Shit I even did some time in prison. But maybe God will over look all that and let me into heaven. But as I lay here now hearing my own heart beat slow down all I can think of is, was it too late to repent? Could I hurry up and say God forgive me and then suddenly see an Angel reaching out for me. Maybe I should try it really quick.
            Wait, maybe, just maybe I’ll make it.


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